Today was such an odd day in my eyes. I wake up so early to get my house in order for my sister Tauyna to come and stay with us. Long day of cleaning etc. Dance, football etc.
I just now realized I didn't even ask my baby how is day was. That is something we had decided to do with eachother everyday.
I did ask him how he was doing and he said he was just down a bit. I can normally tell when he is down just by his facial expressions. There are so many days when I WISH I could have more down days than him. Only because I feel like he has so many down days they over power the good ones. I want him to one day not think he is cursed and deserves all the pain in the world.
When he was having a really rough day the other day and he kept saying "Why not him?" I was so sad. Because I did lose my daughter who was cheated out of a full life with us. But I don't know how I would ever heal without him if it was him. He doesn't know it or maybe feel like it but he is really my ROCK. He is the reason I keep it moving. yes the kids also. But I just always think of all the struggles he has been through and if he is still standing in front of me then I can keep it moving to. He really is my strength. We do have our days but overall I KNOW we love eachother, we care about eachother! Alot of couples are doing it to do it. We are doing it because we love eachother.
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